Did you see me? Of course you didn’t. I didn’t see me either. I was walking in the street, my hair flying in the wind. You know my hair, it isn’t thick and heavy; it’s light and soft, that’s why it was easy for the wind to lift my wisps up and twirl them around in the air. Everything was free and liberated, even my hair.
The wind was blowing in my direction, so my hair was lifted up and away from me. I tell you… it was a marvellous sensation. I was flooded with strange emotions… I felt free!!
I was wearing a soft cotton blouse. It wasn’t black. I know you know I love black clothes, and that half my wardrobe is black. However in this case I wasn’t wearing anything black. The blouse I was wearing was white. Yes, I don’t know what made me wear white, I’m not going to lie to you and say that I never wear white, or that I don’t have any clothes that are white, I simply have to have a specific reason to buy that color. Sometimes, I buy it because it’s the only color that goes with a particular pair of pants, or it’s the only color available in a blouse that caught my eye. At times, I just buy white for the sake of change.
Wait, I think I forgot, it was the pants that were white, not the blouse. I love white jeans, they look nice on me, but I don’t wear them much, because when I go out wearing white, I become obsessed by worry that they might get dirty and when I do, I spend the whole time trying to hide the spots, which simply ruins the fun of going out.
Where were we?? Right, I was telling you I had white jeans on, my body, you know, helps me to do that. Honestly though, I was happy with my body that day, just walking in the street, my hair flying with the wind, wearing my white jeans. The blouse was blue, yes I remember now, it was sky blue, and it clings to me because the wind is blowing against me. Oh, everything was so free at that moment, my hair, my blouse, my legs. How can I express what my legs felt like, I was walking on the air!!
“Was the street tempting?” Are you asking me? I don’t know, perhaps it was, I wasn’t really aware of the street, the beauty of it all was the sense of freedom; the sensation of walking with no scarf on my head, nothing covering my hair, my hair flying in the wind, my blouse trying to get away from me, my legs transformed into wings. Do you understand that feeling?
What did you say? You think what I’m saying is silly?
Me too, I was thinking while I was writing that my words may seem silly, a woman walking on the street, nothing covering her hair, wearing white jeans and blue blouse, so what?
But
Do you know?
I’ve never been able to achieve that dream, I mean to walk in our street, no cover on my head, wearing a blue blouse and a pair of white jeans.
I think I’ll die before our street sees my light soft hair flying in the wind.
Translated from the Arabic by Hailah Alkhalaf